Student begins to think they've been living in the wrong Straz
Alundra Blayze, a freshman in the college of engineering, has begun to worry that she has been living in the wrong Straz. “On move-in...
Catholic students prepare for Ash Ketchum Wednesday
“Gotta catch ‘em all!” was the catchphrase of Pokemon Master Ash Ketchum, and this Wednesday is his annual celebration, Ash Ketchum...
Sodexo to replace all cereal dispensers with encased meat dispensers
On Wednesday, Sodexo announced that instead of cereal being served at dining halls, raw, encased meat will be served. “We think that...
Physical reveals President Lovell is 3 children in a trench coat
According to the results of his yearly physical, President Michael Lovell is actually a group of three children standing on each other’s...
Golden Seagull accepts Nattie’s Challenge
We here at the Golden Seagull are hereby accepting Nattie’s request to “work this out in the ring.” Not only do we accept the challenge,...
Professor has yet to grade a single assignment
In an unsurprising move, Philosophy professor David Von Erich has yet to grade any assignments this year. Von Erich, who is in his 30th...
