#DaveKlinger

Commons Receives B Rating After 'Nasty Patty Night' Kills Health Inspector

Basketball Programs Outshined by #1 Ranked Wii Bowling Team

Warm weather beckons 8,000 students to emerge from sewers and hammock until September

Marquette announces birth of beautiful baby limo

Unmotivated senior unable to finish anythi

Freshman assumes Rock The Mall concert will be like Coachella

Adjusting his Toon Squad jersey and zipping his fanny pack, freshman Shawn Cooley prepared for what he expected to be a “life-changing...

President Lovell goes undercover boss as AMU swipe lady

Last week President Lovell went undercover as a swipe lady at Marquette Place in an attempt to explore the inner workings of the...

MUSG Candidate Ben Dombrowski reportedly used private email server to send dank memes

WASHINGTON - The FBI announced Wednesday morning that it will begin an investigation on MUSG presidential candidate Ben Dombrowski’s...

Friend from freshman orientation stops saying hi

MCCORMICK - George Peabody stepped on an elevator and noticed a friend from freshman orientation boarded and barely glanced at him,...

The Golden Seagull is a student-run satirical news site founded in 2016 by Ian Schrank and Josh Kujawinski. Our mission is to provide the students of Marquette University with best coverage of news big and small, national and local, real and fake.

With the exception of public figures, the Golden Seagull uses all invented names in its stories. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. The Golden Seagull is not associated with Marquette University.