#UnitedStates

Commons Receives B Rating After 'Nasty Patty Night' Kills Health Inspector

Basketball Programs Outshined by #1 Ranked Wii Bowling Team

Warm weather beckons 8,000 students to emerge from sewers and hammock until September

Marquette announces birth of beautiful baby limo

Unmotivated senior unable to finish anythi

U.S. Government Lists Schroeder Chicken Parm as a Schedule II Controlled Substance

Milwaukee – On Tuesday, the Chicken Parmesan dish served in Marquette University’s Schroeder Hall, earned a Schedule II controlled...

BREAKING: President Lovell drops out of Rio Olympics

Marquette University president Michael Lovell is the latest United States athlete to announce that he will not compete in the 2016 Rio...

Student impressed with Marquette's geographic diversity

PALATINE- After a recent campus visit, incoming Marquette freshman James Hendricks was reportedly blown away by the University’s student...

Man on Ten Dollar Bill missing his Goatee and Dark Hair

It seems the ten-dollar founding father without a father is an imposter! All around the United States, people have been reporting that...

The Golden Seagull is a student-run satirical news site founded in 2016 by Ian Schrank and Josh Kujawinski. Our mission is to provide the students of Marquette University with best coverage of news big and small, national and local, real and fake.

With the exception of public figures, the Golden Seagull uses all invented names in its stories. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. The Golden Seagull is not associated with Marquette University.