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Marquette University names another building Straz because why not


MILWAUKEE – Marquette University announced today that Coughlin Hall will be renamed Straz Complex, because why not?

“Students and faculty know and love Straz Tower and Straz Hall,” said the University in Monday’s press release. “The administrative board decided, why stop at two Straz buildings?”

As of this morning, new students will have to distinguish between three different buildings all named after David Straz, just because. This new change comes just in time to confuse students in the class of 2020. Experts predict that there will now be twice as many confused students showing up to Straz Tower looking for classrooms.

"The board made this decision with careful consideration after discussing it with faculty and alumni," the press release went on. "The general consensus seemed to be 'aw what the heck, let's do it.'"

While many students are willing to accept this change without question, Sophomore Andy Ewald thinks there must be a good reason.

“Maybe the university is trying to create a greater sense of community.” Ewald suggested. “Freshmen deal with all kinds of change and confusion in the first few weeks of school. Maybe they want us all to feel closer by making us all confused."

It is not clear at this time if Straz Complex will be the last building to be named Straz on campus. An anonymous tip suggested that the new residence hall could also be called Straz, but it will have to wait until the university comes up with a word other than "Tower," "Hall," or "Complex" to come after it.

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