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Marquette’s Illinois natives migrate south for Winter Break


MILWAUKEE – The seasonal movement from Marquette’s Illinois student population kicked into full swing last week, after an event known to the species as “finals week.”

This strange occurrence often involves high risk, including up to 2 ½ hours in a car, and having to deal with rush hour in the Chicago Loop. The migration is primarily driven by the availability of food, shelter, and proximity to Chicago area sports events.

The journey, a roughly 93 mile expedition, can take a physical toll on the species. These migrating Illinoisans navigate using celestial cues from the sun and stars, highway maps, and, if necessary, Google Maps.

The event has garnered attention from nature observation enthusiasts nationwide, as countless observers flock to Milwaukee to witness the bi-annual event in person every year.

“It’s amazing,” said seasonal migration enthusiast Dillon Olberman, “You can tell so much about the species with just one glance at them. For instance, many of them wear blue shirts giving homage to a man with the last name of Bryant, a figure they hold in Christ-like regard.”

The migratory patterns of the Illinois natives match the trends from previous years, specifically, migrations right before winter and summer breaks.

This mass migration of Illinois natives from Milwaukee to Chicago matches the broad patterns of big events in the Chicago area as well. These include historical happenings such as the Cubs World Series Victory parade, the Blackhawks Stanley Cup parade, and perhaps most important of all, when Justin Bieber played at the Allstate Arena 2016.

Once leaving the Milwaukee area, many students end up in suburbs which are close in proximity to Chicago, yet still refer to themselves as hailing from Chicago, a topic that’s a source of great animosity among Chicago area students at Marquette.

The bi-annual event will actually be featured on the National Geographic Channel in an upcoming documentary, which is scheduled to air in early 2018, entitled “I’m From Chicago: A Suburban Illinois Student’s Journey Home.”

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